Embarrassing Public Moments: Volume 1: Bad Pants but Cool Hair

You sneak out of the house wearing “whatever clothes” to grab a quick grocery item from store X, and someone stops you to ask you a question.

*Whatever clothes: clothing arrangements that are unsuitable for display in non-zoo and non-circus environments.*

You freeze like a deer in headlights because you know your outfit is wack, but you don’t want to seem rude by running away.

So, you stand there and listen to the question, hoping the random shoppers don’t look down at your pink slip-on sneakers, black socks, and blue two-inch-highwater jogging pants.

*Highwaters =

pants that aren’t long enough to cover the bottom portion of your socks or your ankles

pants that would not get wet if you walked through a flood

pants that would expose your knees if you ever got a wedgie

Wedgie: the result of pants navigating upward and inserting themselves into your buttcrack. *

pants

You sweat a little as you think, “Are highwaters in or out now? Are black socks really any better than white socks when you wear highwaters? Maybe I should scratch my knees and pretend I’m pulling these pants up on purpose. Damn. Why don’t these people ever stop me when I’m not dressed like a vagabond?”

Fortunately, the shoppers think you have cool hair, and their question is about how you perform your bleaching procedures. Their eyes never move downward, so you sigh relief as you explain the bleach-to-developer ratio and toner factor.

You run off and grab your groceries after the shoppers leave, and you shake your head about your poor fashion choices. The wind tickles your ankles at the exit door to remind you how silly you are.

*The image above was originally posted by The 202, who wrote an informative and interesting blog about highwaters in 2012. It is not the property of this blog writer, who came across it while searching for an image to describe her pants.*

*Employment Realm blogs will no longer be focused on career-related musings. We’ll let the expert career writers handle that. This blog will now focus on whatevs, and we’ll post blogs whenevs. – Ghost*